Incorporating kids at your wedding

Children at weddings? Do you invite them or not? It’s always a heated topic when discussing wedding planning and we’re here to help you make a properly informed decision. Read on to find out more…

Do you invite all kids? Just babies? Or just teenagers? What about if you’re having young flowergirls and pageboys? Can you then ban your friends from bringing their offspring (we think not).

In addition, you may have teenagers at your wedding too. They are easier to entertain (they’ll like chatting to friends and maybe even dancing if they consider the music cool enough) but you’re still going to have to bear their likes and dislikes in mind.

First off, let’s think about the young children. Very young babies aren’t such a problem – they’ll hopefully sleep and can be cuddled by everybody (something the grannies usually enjoy!)

However toddlers and under 5s can be quite demanding. Supermodel Kate Moss solved this problem at her wedding by having a marquee dedicated to children, with drama teachers and nannies on call.

Obviously that’s not something most of us can copy as we don’t all have a supermodel’s budget, but you can have children’s play areas on your wedding day – maybe a corner of the marquee or barn stocked with colouring books, toys and somewhere peaceful to watch a DVD. Overtired children can get tearful so if you can have a quiet chill-out area for them, so much the better.

If you’re having a Christmas wedding, you could invite ‘Santa’ to visit the young children and bring a gift – this would be good timing just after the wedding speeches when everybody is getting ready to party.

Finally, if you do employ childcare for the event, make sure that the individual is CRB checked beforehand.

Children of all ages – including ‘seen it all before’ teens will enjoy watching a good magician – particularly one who works the tables and does magic close up.

An experienced conjurer will gauge his tricks according to the age group he’s entertaining – you just have to look at the cult following of Dynamo to see that ‘how did he do that’ magic has never been more popular.

If you’re having a summer wedding and you’ve room outside, consider having a bouncy castle for the kids but alternate sessions for different age groups. An energetic 12-year-old boy let loose amongst toddlers will quickly result in tears and of course you’ll need to have a responsible adult to keep an eye on proceedings.

Garden games always go down well (but remember they’re largely weather dependent). You can hire giant games of Jenga, croquet and even old-fashioned fairground swings.

The trick to making sure kids have a great time at your wedding is to think about them beforehand, maybe consulting the parents as to what they like and have some planned strategies and entertainments.

 

Hair & Beauty for the big day

Something old

Keep your hair healthy by trimming and conditioning regularly during the run up to your wedding, and don’t be surprised if your stylist wants you to wash your hair the night before. Just washed hair is often too soft and silky – hair behaves better for styling when it is a day old and means pins, veils and hair accessories grip better.

Flawless foundations

The prettiest bridal makeup always features flawless skin as a base, so your foundation must be a perfect match for your skin. You can add colour afterwards with bronzer, soft blusher and lipstick. Choose a lipstick and lip liner that will give your smile definition… especially with neutral or barely there shades. Contour and highlight carefully but don’t over do it – you can take a black and white photograph to check whether your contouring is too dark, if need be it can easily be toned down.

Eye it up

Your eyes are the most expressive part of your face and you’ll be amazed at the difference well groomed eyebrows can make since they quite literally frame your eyes. Neutral colours will enhance your natural eye colour, but don’t be afraid to use a little sparkle, which can look stunning on the most natural makeup. Individual eyelashes are great for lifting and accentuating the outer eye area, and don’t forget to add waterproof mascara!

Best of both

If you can’t decide whether to wear your hair up or down, why not have both? Ask your wedding stylist to add some curl or volume first, then create a soft, natural up style that can be easily let down later on in the evening. If you’re struggling to choose a hair accessory and have decided against a veil, a delicate hair comb or small spiral hair pins  can be added in to complement your hairstyle and add a subtle sparkle to your look.

On trial

Book your trial around six to eight weeks before your wedding. If you just can’t wait that long, ask your stylist for a consultation as early as you like so you can meet and discuss the look you’re aiming for. A Pinterest board reserved for bridal hair and makeup is a great way to show your stylist your ideas. Don’t wear black or bright coloured tops to your trial – a colour close to that of your wedding dress will mean you’ll get a much clearer idea of how your makeup colours will work on the day.

Flashy lashes

Eyelash extensions are becoming a really popular option and it’s something I often suggest to my brides. They can really open up the eyes and can look more natural than strip lashes, especially when applied so that they gradually increase in length towards the outer corners. The added bonus of these is that you get to keep them for your honeymoon!

Flowers everywhere

If you love flowers, ask your florist to wire tiny buds and sprigs that complement your bouquet so that your stylist can work these into your hairstyle. This creates a timelessly romantic look and can be a fresh and pretty alternative to more traditional headpieces or wedding hair accessories.

 

Pets at Weddings

When planning a wedding couples involving their beloved pets are becoming an increasingly common trend. However, as any animal lover will know, pets can be unpredictable – which is something you do not want on the most important day of your life! Follow these tips if you’re thinking about involving your pet at your wedding.

This simple, yet very important step is easy to forget, but this is the first thing you should add to your ‘pets at weddings’ to–do list. Imagine showing up on your wedding day, with your four–legged friend in tow, and being told that animals are not allowed on the property.

If your venue are happy to accommodate your pet, make sure there is always a bowl of water and treats available and an easy exit if they start barking. Maybe take your pet to your venue before the big day so they’re used to it, as it’s a strange and new place for them.

Notify your wedding photographer that you’re planning to include your pooch in the wedding photos, as this will allow your photographer to prepare any fun photography ideas involving your pet, and will also allow for them to prep for any other details – like unpredictable pet behaviour, etc.

Always take into consideration the type of personality your pet has before giving them a specific role – are they excitable, aggressive or obedient? You may want to make your pet ring bearer, but think about whether your pet will enjoy this or will they find it a traumatic experience? You may assume that your pet will feel comfortable in the crowd but will they feel overwhelmed around 100s of guests?

Even if your pet is well–behaved and used to large crowds, there is no real guarantee that they’ll behave like that on the day. Being stroked, photographed or chased by kids can becoming increasingly stressful for your pet so make sure they can handle it before you involve them.

It is always worth informing your guests early on that you’re going to include your pet at your wedding. Provide this information on the save-the-date cards and again on the invitation, as this is a warning to anyone with allergies and it means they can plan in advance so they can still enjoy your special day.

There is nothing cuter than a pup in a tux or a cat with a bow tie, but make sure it fits properly and is comfortable so your pet can enjoy your day. It’s best to keep the accessories simple to avoid any pitfalls – a flower or little bow tie attached to their collar is a fun way to dress up your pet, and still looks super cute! Always double-check that none of their accessories are a choking hazard to your pet and that none of the flowers you used are poisonous.

Whilst it’s lovely to have your beloved pooch around your wedding day, it’s important that you allow yourself time to relax and not worry about them. Why not hire a pet sitter to be responsible for bringing your pet to the ceremony? Watching him during the ceremony / reception and taking them home before it gets too rowdy as the night goes on? That way you won’t need to worry about who’s feeding them, if they’ve got enough water and if they’ve devoured the wedding cake yet!

 

First Dance Songs

While this dance is probably the most momentous you’ll ever have, it will also be the first of many. It’s one dance at the beginning of the evening that will soon slip into a dance floor full of people partying with you, so relax. Yes, all eyes will be on you as you enjoy your first dance together, but in a lovely kind of way and not in the style of a Strictly judge.

That being said, there are a few golden rules when it comes to first dance song choices. Follow these and whatever first dance song you choose, you’ll love it.

Don’t rule out first dance songs simply because they are popular – they are popular for a reason! Of course it’s lovely to make your wedding unique, but there are other elements of your reception that allow you to do that. Plus, just because a song has been played for a hundred first dances before yours, it doesn’t make it any less personal or appropriate for the two of you, too.

In recent years, our featured couples have turned to Ed Sheeran’s songs above and beyond any other artist. Original? No. Perfect in style and sentiment? Absolutely.

Don’t be tempted to jump on the bandwagon of a trend on a day as significant as your wedding. You’ll remember this dance forever, so the first dance song you choose needs to stand the test of time. While it might sound oh-so funny at your hen do to choose ‘Sex Bomb’, come your wedding day you could regret it.

We’re not saying all first dance song ideas need to be slow, but you do need to think about how you’ll actually dance to the song.

We recommend at least a handful of evenings spent practising in your living room. Why not wear in your wedding day heels at the same time? You’ll make hilarious memories and feel natural but prepared come the big day.

 

How to Deliver a Wedding Speech

Everyone gets nervous delivering a speech, some people run better off the adrenaline and some people dissolve into a trembling mess. Those who get overly nervous can end up being too serious or lose track of where they are up to fairly quickly. Take our wedding speech advice into consideration and it should help to take the edge off.

Keep it simple

If you are a nervous public speaker, don’t try to run before you can walk. Crack a joke but don’t try too hard. Don’t hang too heavily on the punchline when your delivery isn’t guaranteed to land.

Tell a story

Speech advice 101: you’re making a speech, not a toast so your audience is expecting something more. If you are delivering a wedding speech, you are most probably going to want to share some anecdotes and happy memories. When writing your speech think of the journey you want to take your audience on and what the key messages you want to convey are.

Rehearse, rehearse, rehearse

The more practice you get in, the better the delivery. You’ll know when your jokes are coming up and how you want them to land. If you are nervous, you will be counting on your memory to help you get everything out as you try to maintain a calm and composed exterior.

The more of your speech you can deliver without having to look at your notes the better. However, do keep some notes handy should you need a gentle reminder of what on earth you’re talking about.

Be yourself

You are only going to deliver this speech once so enjoy it, be yourself and let your personality shine through. You are delivering this speech because of your relationship to the newlyweds, not because you’re being lined up for a future presenter. Nobody’s perfect and delivering a flawless speech is tough. As long as you get your message across, be it a little nervously, everyone is sure to love it.

The toast

Finally, the toast! Don’t rush to sit down but rather, invite everyone to join you in raising a glass to the happy couple as you round off your speech.

 

Traditional Church Weddings

What are the legal requirements for a church wedding?

Most marriages require banns to be published before the wedding, signifying your intention to marry. These need to be read out in the parish where each of you lives, as well as the church where you’ll be married for three Sundays during the three months before the wedding.

If there isn’t enough time for this, you can apply for a license costing from £200, which you may also need if one of the couple isn’t British or lives outside England. In Scotland, you need to give 15 days’ notice with the local registrar.

Couples must be 18 to marry without their parents’ consent in England, Wales and Northern Ireland, or 16 with their approval. The ceremony must take place between 8am and 6pm, witnessed by two people.

In Scotland it’s legal to marry from 16 without consent and at any time of day, although you do still require two witnesses.

Can I get married in any church?

For a Wedding ceremony in England and Wales, you can marry in any church if you meet one of several conditions: that either of you has lived or attended services in the parish for at least six months, was baptized or prepared for confirmation there, that one of your parents or grandparents was married in the parish, or one of your parents has lived or attended services there for at least six months after you were born. If you’ve recently moved, you’ll be eligible to marry in your new parish too.

In Scotland, there are no residency requirements so you can marry in any church you choose. In practice, it may depend on availability and the individual minister who’s likely to want to meet couples who aren’t members of the church beforehand.

In Northern Ireland, one of the couple must be resident in the district where you plan to marry for at least 14 days before being eligible, unless you apply for a special licence

Do I have to attend church before I can get married there?

Not for a Church of England ceremony, although if your heart is set on marrying in a church where you have no connections, attending services for six months — even a single service each month — would allow this.

Are the rules different in Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland?

Yes — Scotland in particular has different laws than England and Wales, while there are stricter residency requirements in Northern Ireland. Catholic churches also differ, for example, needing a dispensation if one person is not Catholic but not requiring the banns to be read.

How far in advance should I book a UK church ceremony?

Churches can become booked up several months in advance, so ask the vicar or church office as early as possible, especially for popular dates. Many churches won’t arrange weddings during Lent, although this doesn’t apply to Catholic ceremonies.

Can I use my own vows in church?

Not in England and Wales, where legally no part of the wedding vows can be changed. However it’s possible to include poems, readings or songs which have a special significance in the service, depending on the individual vicar. In Scotland, you can vary the traditional forms or write your own with the minister’s approval.

 

The brides wedding speech

Plenty of brides are are grabbing the mic – or asking their bridesmaids or mother to do the honours.

In a recent survey*, it was revealed that more than a fifth of women were planning on giving a speech on their big day.

Whatever the running order, speeches need to be well planned. The good news is that women do tend, to be more organised.

Bride speech subjects

If a bride chooses to make a speech, the first thing she should do is discuss what subjects with her husband-to be, so they don’t go over the same ground in terms of their thank-yous.

So, after thank-yous, what should you be talking about? Your beloved, of course! Their quirks are a welcome topic, especially if it come with a healthy dollop of humour.

Things that should never be said? Never use it as an opportunity to air laundry. It might only last a few minutes, but people can remember speeches forever.

Although tradition dictates that the groom toasts the bridesmaids, it’s likely that a bride will want to talk about her friends too.

The most important thing to remember is to speak slowly, with poise and purpose. Dispel any anxiety by focusing on your new spouse; they’re the reason you’re making a speech in the first place.

And remember, you’re not an actor or comic – you’re you, on the best the day of your life. Speak from the heart and you won’t go far wrong!

The dos and don’ts of speech making

  • Don’t make ‘in jokes’ that are alienating to the majority of your guests
  • Do speak slowly and take your time
  • Don’t feel you have to make ‘gags’ with a punchline
  • Do keep your speech sub-10 minutes. No matter how good it is, you don’t want to run the risk of boring the wedding party and guests
  • Don’t just list people you’d like to thank – add texture to your speech with anecdotes

Stick to traditions

When planning a wedding more couples than ever are doing away with Britain’s great wedding traditions – from confetti throwing, to the classic white bridal gown. We all know what to expect with a Great British wedding – the white dress, the exchange of rings, a toast to the bride and groom, and confetti in the air as the happy couple drive away in a “Just Married” car.

But it turns out that more couples than ever are throwing the rulebook out the window, almost a third admitted that they wouldn’t insist on any wedding traditions at all on their big day, while nearly three quarters of brides stated that they wouldn’t choose to wear a white dress.

Only a third would recite traditional vows on their wedding day, while only a fifth would want a toast to the bride and groom. One in four couples would also insist on guests throwing confetti at the end of their ceremony.

The way couples think about their big day and what they want is changing, some of the traditions we take for granted are being challenged and it’s not just the big day itself that is looking different, either.

Traditions around the build-up to a wedding – especially the hen and stag experience – and what happens after are also being given a different flavour.

As it turns out, two in five couples would want to combine their stag and hen night (rising to half among 16 to 34 year olds), while only two in five brides keep their dress a secret before the big day. As many as eight per cent of brides would want the groom to take their name, rather than the other way around.

Even present lists are being challenged, as nine out of 10 newlyweds asked for money towards their honeymoon rather than more traditional gifts, like homeware or vouchers.

In the same way that stag and hen parties are changing – with foreign trips to exciting destinations being favoured instead of the local pub – the wedding day itself seems to be evolving, it will be interesting to see what new trends emerge over the next 20.

 

Wedding Times

What Time Of Day Should You Get Married?

While 11am or 1pm remain the most popular ceremony time historically, sunset and candlelit weddings are pretty appealing too.  So, how should you choose what time to get married?

When you first meet with your wedding venue coordinator, you’ll be presented with options for the scheduled timings of a traditional wedding day. While they may be popular for good reason – a 1pm ceremony gives you plenty of time to get ready and take photographs with your bridal party – there’s nothing to say that your perfect day has to fit the same mould.

Over the last few years, here in the UK marriage laws have relaxed considerably. These allow for more relaxed schedules in turn. So, if you’ve been imagining a sunrise elopement with the dawn chorus or exchanging vows beneath the stars, they needn’t be pipe dreams anymore.

There may be times that are particularly sentimental for you as a couple. How about the time of your first date, of the proposal, or other relationship milestones, for example. You could use these to guide the time you marry too.

The time of year you choose to tie the knot will influence the time you choose to hold your ceremony. If you want a candlelit ceremony or to have your couples portraits at sunset, then you’ll be able to tie the knot much earlier in the day during the winter months than in the summer.

But, while moonlit ceremonies do sound very romantic, you must consider the practicalities of your chosen times too. Your wedding needs to be held at a comfortable time for your guests to attend and suppliers to set up. Thorough planning in advance will make many things possible, though.

Perhaps the set up can be completed the day before and accommodation provided for your guests…

There’s also the question of whether you want exclusive use. If you’ve chosen a wedding venue that is open to the public, then you may need to work around their opening hours to have the place to yourselves. You could encounter this if your venue is a country house with open gardens during the day, a gallery or a museum, for example.

There are benefits of marrying a little later in the day once the crowds have dispersed, though. A 5pm ceremony means you only need to cater for one meal, saving you a significant sum of money that could be invested on your honeymoon instead

On the other hand, if you’ve booked multiple wedding entertainment acts, then it makes sense to hold your ceremony earlier to give you time to enjoy it all. We’ve seen couples book everything from magicians and fire-breathers to photobooths, bands and bouncy castles. Some entertainment will be better suited to the daytime or evening. Anything for children specifically should be planned earlier in the day.

 

DIY your Wedding

It’s great to see that so many brides and grooms-to-be are drawing on their own talents, and no doubt those around them, to make their big day their own. It is lovely to be able to make your wedding special and unique to you by having real input into it.

When the newlyweds were asked to reveal which items were made or altered through do-it-yourself means, they found the most common DIY details to be the favours, invitations, and the wedding cake. The more unusual answers included the wedding dress (9%), the music or entertainment (6%), and even conducting the service or ceremony (2%)!

Here are the top 10 DIY details at weddings:

Photography – 19%

Flowers – 18%

Catering – 15%

Order of service prints – 14%

Guest book – 13%

Beverages – 11%

Favours – 41%

Invitations – 38%

Wedding cake – 24%

Venue decorations/styling – 21%

DIY is not for everyone, though, and if you’re starting to feel a little overloaded or panicked, you need to make sure you have time to put your feet up too! It’s okay to get some outside help, but be sure you can trust wedding suppliers and that they can help you make your dreams a reality.

A survey conducted found that fewer than one fifth of weddings do not feature any do-it-yourself touches, with the vast majority of newlyweds relying on the method to save a bit of money, add that oh-so-special personal touch, and to make sure everything is done the way you want it.

Most guests love to see a bit of a handmade touch in weddings, and that’s why there is no surprise about how many people are DIYing their wedding these days.